Sun Salutation

Winter Solstice 2013

On the darkest day of the year, we reset our karma by doing the sun salutation, or Surya Namaskar, 108 times. As we salute the sun we light a symbolic fire in our hearts and recognize fire's potential for destruction, and also creation.

Our breath mirrors the natural rhythm of the tide, changing seasons and cycles, birth, youth, maturity and death. The series of peaks an valleys in earth's geography and also a reflection of the contrast between happy and sad, tragedy and humor.

Life is one big giant yin-yang, if you think about it. The early 90s want it back. That was supposed to be funny.

Go set fire to something. Namaste.

Bulletproof Tea

Intermittent fasting is a hot topic in health and fitness right now. You may have already checked out the bulletproof executive or Precision Nutrition article on IF and Bulletproof Fasting.

But even if you haven't, check this out. Even if you would never fast, this is a tasty beverage. So point  that pinky out and get to sippin'!

If you are a fan of feeling awesome all the time and want some kind of tasty beverage (without the addictive, insulin-spiking, inflammatory effects of carbohydrate), you need to try this:

Step 1

Make tea. Pick something that is naturally caffeine-free (unless you want to be up past your bedtime). 

Step 2

Transfer your tea into a mason jar. Or something else that will work for step 4.

Step 3

Add coconut oil. Or unsalted grass-fed butter.

Step 4

Use an immersion blender to emulsify.

Step 5

Serve it like an eviction notice!

Caveman-ifesto

I was reading a blog today and came across a primal journal entry written by a young guy who is trying to live a primal lifestyle in order to balance his metabolism and lose weight.
As I read it, I thought to myself, "This is really cool in a way that is both honest and a little cheesy." I didn't use that exact wording, but you get the idea. I read on and I was a little bit humbled by the kid's honesty with himself. It is very easy to spot the mistakes of others, and it is a constant struggle to keep my world view in line with reality!
I have decided to work on a manifesto, for a couple of reasons, really. First, I love the word "manifesto." It sounds rebellious, violent, rude, communist, defiant and rock 'n roll. Makes me think if I was alive in the earlier part of the 20th century, I would have been one of those crazy bohemian pinkos making pamphlets about civil rights and hanging out with writers and musicians and other trash. I dig it. Second, a manifesto is a set of values, a code to live by. Once the mind is clear of Marxist associations, the word itself smacks of personal integrity and the desire to see the world in a state of balance. Sounds pretty cool, right?

TV serial killer Dexter Morgan has a code, a manifesto, and now so do I. Check it out:

My Caveman-ifesto
Today I will live how I am supposed to: free of B.S.
I will avoid distractions and focus on what is important.
I will create balance in my life: I will not give without taking or take without giving.

Stop spinning your wheels

There are a lot of ways to waste time, and a lot of reasons to do it. I like to waste time on weekends, when my wife and I play hooky from household chores and go on a walk instead. In pretty much all the other areas of life, making efficient use of time is important to everyone.

Think about it. If you are a typical red-blooded American, you probably wake up at the last possible second, get ready for work, microwave some sort of hot/lean/egg/meat/cheese "pocket" or stuffed toaster pastry thing and eat it in the car on your way to work, washing it down with a cup of coffee from one of those Keurig machines that people seem to love so much. Why? Because it's fast!

Maybe you go to the gym on the way home, flip the beast mode switch because if you work out harder you don't have to work for as long, right? not seeing changes yet? You are probably missing a few pieces of the puzzle. You are spinning your wheels on that one.

People don't like to waste time. I hate wasting time. I have turned away clients who refuse to commit to at least 3 months working with me. Why? Because time is the one thing we cannot get more of. Money? Sure. Friends? Unless you're a complete asshole, yes. And so on...

I have wasted plenty of time in my life. If I think about all the unproductive conversations, relationships, and jobs I have had-commitments that have gotten me nowhere-it could give even a badass like Clint Eastwood in Dirty Harry or Bruce Willis in Die Hard a panic attack.

So if you are looking for shortcuts, go get some steroids, or liposuction, or T3 shots, or a fake tan, or HGH, some Adderall to wake you up and Ambien to knock you out (F.Y.I. you might kill someone in your "sleep"). The law of action-reaction boils down to one thing: there a consequences. Take steroids, grow bitch-tits. Lipo, you might die on the table or have cottage-cheese belly. Do T3, the body will reduce production and you will have to take it forever. Adderall affects norepinephrine, dopamine and serotonin pathways in the brain, possibly leading to depression and adrenal fatigue. Although Ambien is "less likely" to get you hooked than pharmaceuticals like benzodiazepines, there are still unpleasant side effects that should be considered. Oh yeah, you rape and kill in your sleep. 

The only way to truly reduce the amount of guessing you need to do to get those results in the gym is to find out more about your body.

Exactly how much body fat are you burning when you ride the bike? Run? Walk? Lift weights?

How many calories do you need each day and from which sources?

Is your level of stress affecting the production of other hormones in the body?

When is cortisol highest in your body throughout the day?

How is your blood glucose affected by the meal you just ate?

Why do these things matter? That is too much for this blog post. I guess I'll just have to write a follow-up.

The point is: stop wring your time and find out what your options really are. With whatever you a struggling with.

If it is your weight, do that lab test I have been telling you about for the last few months. If it is stress, reduce it by using adaptogens like coleus forskholii and natural sedatives like valerian root and melatonin. If it is glucose, get a glucose tear and test throughout the day, log your food, compare notes with your trainer or dietitian. If it is an unproductive relationship or job, maybe stop wasting your time waiting for things to change and move on with your life. And while you're at it, stop killing people in your sleep, it's just weird!

Tanka Bar

I found a great bar for people who are following an anti-inflammatory or paleo eating strategy.
Check it out:

1:1 protein to carbs
Soy free
Gluten free
GMO free

Buffalo is the first ingredient - Do I need to keep going? It just gets better: Tanka bar is made by native americans! Hell yeah.

DIY sex change

Hey bra,

Love boobs? How would you like to have a set of your own? How about a vagina to go with those lovely knockers? 

No? Well how about your body just makes all the hormones that a woman's body makes and you get to keep your ding-dong? No need to go all pain olympics with a cleaver you tranny! 

I just found an article about the effects of beer consumption by dudes. It's pretty crazy!

Man-boobs and weight gain - Sounds like most of the flabby, depressed, pasty, de-motivated sad-sacks that most guys become when they get to be about 30 something. Looks like since I was lucky enough to be a raging alcoholic and smack fiend, I might as well get something out of having to drink only water while watching all the other guys drink tasty beverages and get shit-housed! I may be doomed to be a teetotaler, but at least my balls work.

I found this article on a website that is currently blowing my mind! What I have long suspected about the beer/man-boob continuum is now confirmed! I guess there IS a DIY way to do everything after all!

Read on...

http://lifetwink.com/beer-hops-estrogen-sedation-of-the-population-men-shouldnt-ever-drink-beer/

New Favorite Magazine

My new favorite magazine is Paleo Magazine (Wow, this is starting out like a 5th grade book report). My wife picked it up at the grocery store a few weeks ago and I have been reading it little by little ever since then. So pretty much every time I take a dump at home.

What do I like about Paleo Magazine? Here's a list:

• Citations after every article. This is not some dumbed-down word-vomit written by some bored-with-life writer who knows next to nothing about trying to live a fitness lifestyle. I can tell that each PM writer is coming from a personal place, and not compiling a haphazardly thrown together crapshoot of "expert's recommendations" that are 20 years out of date. This is the real deal, and if you don't believe it, you can look at the studies. They are right there in your face - Boom!
• Positivity. In the article Paleo is a Practice (Paleo Magazine February/March 2013), Adam Farrah lets the reader know that giving yourself slack in not only OK, it is good for you. When it comes to dealing with setbacks and bumps in the road Farrah asks these questions, "Are you an encouraging coach or a relentless bully? Are you living in the present or are you stuck resenting and replaying the past? Are you reliving your mistakes over and over in your head?" I get stuck doing that sometimes, and it never gets me anywhere! Very refreshing to read an article on a topic like that written by a man and it not come across as a total wuss-fest.
• Shopping resources and pantry lists. Complete with website info to find out where to get things, tips and tricks and things to watch out for. Very helpful.
• I just checked out the Paleo Magazine website, which is very cool despite not being completely finished (when opened, the community tab says something like "coming soon"). Big deal - I can live without want ads for kombucha cultures for a little while longer. There are lifestyle and recipe tabs that more than make up for the lack of a paleo craigslist or whatever that means.

My favorite thing about the website is this cool quadrupedal movement video workout. I love stuff like this! Check it out: http://paleomagonline.com/learning-to-crawl/
Tell me what you think!

My life after heroin

There was a commercial several years ago. You know the one. The star was an egg, or maybe the really angry girl who trashed the kitchen screaming about how bad heroin fucked up her life. Whatever, she was right about the fact that it messes you up really bad.

I'm writing this because earlier today I talked on the phone with an old friend who is going through a rapid detox from methadone. Sometimes they do that if you don't pay enough on your bill at the clinic. He wanted to get off methadone anyway, and this is his chance to be free from opiates.

This is also a really dangerous time, because the tolerance is low and if the addict uses, there is a much great chance of overdose. If you have ever lost a fiend or relative to heroin, this is usually how it happens. That's how completely twisted this drug is.

Detoxing from an opioid is the worst feeling in the world. It feels like every part of your body has a headache, fever and chills at the same time. You are so tired, but you can't sleep. Food is the most disgusting thing on the planet, except maybe watermelon. Liquid fire is shooting out your butt every five minutes. You feel sexually aroused and totally asexual at the same time. You might hurt so bad you cry, but crying feels fake and it bugs you that you are even doing that. Everything hurts. Everything is disgusting. Nobody understands. Nothing can fix you... On and on and on....

... For five days.

When the opiate fever breaks, there is the uneasy feeling of being born. Addiction's afterbirth is still covering your body, no that's actually sweat.
I remember feeling so nervous and alone that I actually though I might pull my face off because I felt like that much of a freak. "Might as well do something totally weird, I feel like Freddy Krueger anyway," I thought to myself as I made a hot-as-hell bath. Showers require standing up, and I was exhausted from not sleeping for a week.

July 5th thru 10th 2008 was one of the hardest weeks of my life. I say one of the hardest because that was by far not the only time I made it through the sweat-lodge hallucinating hell that is opiate withdrawal.
That was an important week for me, because after staying clean for almost 3 years, I was ready to stop opioid replacement therapy. This would be the last
I made myself a promise that I would do whatever it took to go through detox again.

It gets better from there. So much better. When I stopped using heroin in 2005, I had over $20,000 dollars in a tangled labyrinth of defaulted loan debt, court costs and medical bills. I had no formal education, no real job skills and no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I just knew I wanted to do something else and be someone else.

I am extremely lucky to have the right people in my life. My support system has been amazing. My wife (who has never been an addict) has been there for me through all of it. I can't imagine if we had stayed broken up after the time she left me after she found out I'd been using (She saw me getting high in my car in front of her house, like she wouldn't know)!
I have made a lot of amazing friends in the years after treatment. Friends I don't see enough, but they are still great. I went back to college, and i might actually finish! I discovered my love of healthy lifestyles and launched a career as a trainer. Most of the best moments in my life have been after surviving addiction.

I can't change the fact that i am an addict, and no one knows why it happens to people. Some people think it is a disease, some think it is a symptom of something else, like being molested or your parents didn't love you enough. Whatever it is, I'm glad at least God made me smart enough to sauté half my brain and still have enough left over to not drool on myself. Not all the time
Life is not easy for anybody, and getting better has been (and continues to be) the hardest thing I have ever done. And the hardest thing for any addict, whether the drug or choice is food, sex, candy, gambling, or TV.

So if there is a chance for him to read this blog, this is what i would want him to see:
My brother from another mother,
I'm so proud of how far you've come, and I know you can make it the rest of the way. You can do anything for one day at a time. You don't have much further to go, and you are strong enough to do this!