Saturday, February 5, 2011

Sage, Swaha and Savasana

Dear diary,

Today I am at a yoga workshop. The smell of sage is everywhere because the room had to be purified with burning sage before we began.

I have been practicing yoga for almost 3 years and I love it.
I tried yoga one day at the request of my girlfriend. We went to a class at the gym across the street and the instructor told us when and how to breath and then guided us through some contortions. I remember thinking, "I will try this one time with an open mind."

I loved it. I wrote in my MySpace blog about it. I loved how with just body weight, balance and stretching it is possible to focus the mind on one thing only, the task at hand.
I love how when you lose focus one what you are doing in the moment, you lose your balance. I would relate that to life, but when that concept is put in words it sounds super cliche.

I will say sometimes it is necessary to put the outside world aside for a second and focus on something as simple as breathing. Or something that is not as simple like lying on your stomach, grabbing the feet behind you and straightening the legs until you are in a colossal backbend, then chanting the om sound. Try thinking about your to-do list in that moment.

"Press the pelvis into the earth."

Let's see, I need to go to the cleaners and pick up that tie that my wife dropped off three weeks ago, pick up snacks for work because i have no time EVER to make snacks, and then call my client's doctor to get that fax number so I can fax a medical release form. That thought never entered my mind today in that hippie back bend. Not once.

"Let both the upper body and the legs come up equally from the floor."

I was actually thinking, This is SO DIFFICULT! And my junk is getting smashed and I need to adjust it, but how do I do that without looking like I am playing with myself? So much for being classy.

"OOOOOOOOoooooommmmmmmmmm."

The woman who is teaching the workshop is cool. She keeps making jokes out of different situations, letting people know that if they have to fart or go to the bathroom that she is not stopping them. she taught the class how to have a Mr. Rodgers moment as she put on her wireless pop star microphone, drawing an analogy between fumbling with a mic and taking off your shoes and jacket and donning a cardigan. She had us making pretend digeridoo noises just for fun and and got everybody to do a silly dance and then made a joke about seeing people at church speaking in tongues. After that we all chanted a mantra.

"Om Srim Hrim Klim Glaum Gam Ganapatayei Swaha"

Good thing they passed out these books with translations in them.

When we were about to break for lunch and went into savasana, she said " Now it's time for a little Shavvi." I thought that was awesome, because a lot of yoga people can be very serious and weird. Not that this isn't weird to some people.

For those who don't know, Savasana is the best part of yoga. You have just worked up a major sweat and now it is time to lie on your back and do nothing but breathe. It comes at the end and it feels like you have just been born. I have never been so thankful for something as simple as breath. If you practice yoga, you know exactly what I am talking about.

Which brings me to the question a lot of people ask. "Isn't that some weird hippy new age stuff?" to which I reply, "Probably, but who cares. Somebody call the police!"

So I have a few more hours of sweaty contortioning and hippie chanting to do after our lunch break, so I better sign off.

BTW the teacher's name is Shiva Rea and she is really famous and awesome so look her up. Some of the people here audibly peed their panties when she walked in the room.
I did not, but she has made a fan out of me. Excuse me while I go try to find her on Facebook.

P.S. I have been on a burrito kick today and yesterday so I bet you I will fart in class before the day is over.

The name of the yoga studio putting together this amazing day of prana flow is Give Yoga Memphis
check out their website and go to a class. I am not being paid to say this, but it is run by an amazing bunch of people. If I was being paid to say it I might come up with a tagline like Yoga that will rock your face off. Link below.

www.giveyogamemphis.com

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Grocery shopping

One of my favorite things to obsess over is food. I have dreams where I am eating, finding or preparing food. Food shows up in my dreams at least once a week, as it has done since I can remember.

According to the dream site I just checked between this paragraph and the last, food dreams symbolize physical or emotional nourishment.
Dreams containing fruit symbolize sensuality, which I find a little disturbing because from ages four to seven I have a recurring dream I had about walking through a citrus grove and a grapefruit falling into my hand off one of the trees. So it would appear I was a little pervert back then wouldn't it?

Before I digress on some kind of weird analysis of my childhood, I have to talk about some exciting ways to get more out of food.

Everybody knows that eating fewer calories means eating more produce. But part of the problem is that we get stuck in ruts with our eating and it is sometimes scary or difficult to try anything new. In short, we eat the same boring food all the time.

Chances are if you are reading this blog, you are trying to improve your fitness. And one of the most obvious effects of being fit is an optimal body composition. Which means you look good in a bathing suit, Sunday suit or birthday suit. What, you thought I meant naked? you're the perv, pervert.

What I am talking about is packing in the most nutrition for the least amount of calories. I am talking about the produce department.
Adam and Eve were nudists and they lived in a produce department. They walked around the garden in the nude until some classical painter guy made them cover it up with a fig leaf.

Since we are usually in the habit of making the same ten or so dishes when we cook, we tend to go to the store, pick out what we need for those dishes and then go home and make them and then watch Dexter while chowing down to the the same boring casserole/beans and rice/meat and potatoes that we always do and basically living the same boring day that we did last week.

What if instead we got some kind of new produce, planned the meal around what is fresh and in season and got the whole family involved in preparing a delicious feast?
Although my wife and I do not have kids, I often include our cat in the preparation of dinner by letting her smell what we are making and then mocking her by making hissing noises, like another, bigger, territiorial cat who knows how to make a london broil.

But in this internet blogorific world where everything I say makes sense and is ridiculously simple yet somehow genious, this is what the family kitchen should look like.

  • Head chef - Parent
  • Sous chef - Other parent or oldest child/pet
  • Line cook - kid or pet
  • Prep cook - kid or pet

... and so on.

Everybody cooks, everybody helps. It's what socialism wants to be when it grows up.

Let's get back to the produce. Produce is super tasty and it can be very inexpensive if you know where to find it. Unless you are addicted to heirloom tomatoes (I have not found anywhere that has them for less than what I would expect pay for a wino's liver. That is a few dollars a pound).
Here are the places you need to be buying produce right now:

  • Winchester Farmer's Market. Winchester and Kirby in Hickory Hill (across from that crazy church with the statue of liberty holding a cross). It is not a farmer's market, despite the misleading name. It is like America had a baby with all your favorite ethnic foods. The store is in a defunct Schnucks and I literall had to pick by jaw up off the floor in the produce department. Bananas, apples, guava, papaya, chinese and indian eggplant, a thousand different kinds of mushrooms and peppers, purple sweet potatoes, weird squashes and melons with spikes all over them. Some of these vegetables could double as a weapon! BTW cheap awesome prices. We got what seems like a bushel of basil for a dollar!
  • Viet Hoa Market. Cleveland and Court in Midtown. Has a ton of exotic produce as well as live eels swimming around in tanks. What's not to love?
  • Easy Way. Various locations. Hands down one of the best places to pick up old ladies. All you have to do is talk about this weather we've been having and you are golden. You may have to watch some of the prices, for example pineapple can sometimes be more than $3 (which is a fair price).

That is all I've got for right now. But I want to post theis recipe for slaw. It goes really well in a wrap with some chicken breast or london broil.

you will need:

  • 6 or so baby bok choy
  • 3 radishes
  • chili paste or crushed red pepper
  • 1 tbsp. rice vinegar
  • 1/2 tsp. low sodiom soy sauce
  • 1 tsp. sesame oil
  • 1 tsp agave nectar 
Slice bok choy into shreds. Sliver the radishes. Put vegetables into a bowl and add the other ingredients. mix it up.

Friday, January 21, 2011

Music to work out to

I love going to estate sales and satisfying my morbid obsession with peeking into other peoples' lives. the place I like to head when I get to an estate sale is the tool shed or garage. after that I head immediately for the records. There is nothing like going through someone's record collection and finding out if they are a sad bastard with a tear in my beer, into show tunes and jazz hands, addicted to shaking their ass to anything with a beat, angry at the world, secretly (or not so secretly) into Kelly Clarkson, the list of possibilities is endless.

You get the idea.

Now you are about to hear some of what I like to listen to. Sometimes the music we work out to isn't the stuff we listen to at other times, but sometimes it is. Sometimes it is really lame music.
I have to admit a Lady Gaga song got stuck in my head. It was like a gay bar DJ had taken over the radio station in my head and left the song on repeat while he left to get another blueberry mojito and do a line off a drag queen's somewhat recently shaved caboose in the bathroom.

So my wife and I share I-tunes because we like a lot of the same stuff. She also likes some very womany music, and although I might never mean for it to happen, I listen to some of her playlists while running. This is for a couple of reasons. The First is that I am lazy and can't seem to make more than one playlist per season. Second, she seems to constantly be making new playlists, thus contributing to my own sluggishness on that tip.
Sometimes something so girly will come on (like female rapper Peaches) that I will need to change it. But I don't. Because it has a constant rythm, good beats and lyrics that are so raunchy that I have to look around to make sure no one can hear what is coming out of the tiny i-pod earbuds that are drowning in a moat of sweat from my ear canal.
And then there are the Black Eyed Peas. So vanilla and safe, yet with that constant beat that is great for cardio.

The best thing I have found for cardio is Girl Talk. Girl talk is a DJ who does insane mash-ups of different genres. He does a Black Sabbath guitar riff with a Ludacris vocal track and it works! Another one is a conglomeration of Beastie Boys, Iggy Pop, and Lady Gaga (looks like she got stuck in someone else's head). Another example is the Ramones with Missy Elliott! One mash-up flows into another into another so seamlessly that you have just completed your first marathon when you realize you were just going to get on the treadmill for a few minutes before you had to go work. So you call in and go buy yourself some icy-hot, because you're a winner.

So these are some of my cardio guilty pleasures. When I lift weights I need something more manly, like the Misfits, GG Allin or Minor Threat. Because I am still a man, despite the occasioal listening to girly cardio music and that close call when Lady Gaga invaded my brain that one time. Don't judge me.

What is your favorite workout music? Any guilty pleasures? Write it in the comment box. I want to know!

Sunday, January 9, 2011

HIIT you in the face

Cardiovascular conditioning is a strange beast. Some people love it. Some people hate it. Sometimes we love and hate it at the same time.

I have that love/hate thing with cardio. I get bored if I have to run a really long distance, because it means doing exactly the same thing for a really long time.

That said, I love running outside. I love swimming. I hate ellliptical machines. I thought I hated treadmills, too.

Until high intensity interval training happened to me. That's HIIT for short.
I like to think of HIIT as a way to make treadmills less boring. Kind of like alcoholic beverages make boring people somewhat more interesting. Or ugly people more attractive. On the flip side, HIIT will never be the reason you have sex with an uggo.

The idea is short bursts of maximal effort followed by periods of rest or recovery, like running sprints. This is a great way to blast fat and raise your metabolic rate for several hours. Unlike distance running, it breaks up your run into manageable chunks of time. As you progress through your run you see yourself achieving each of the smaller goals you have set for yourself.
At the end of the run you have an awesome feeling of accomplishment, which makes it easy to stay on track with your workouts and healthy eating.

Here is how to get a great HIIT workout:

Imagine a scale from 1 to 10. 1 is almost no effort at all and 10 is maximal effort. This scale is called rate of perceived exertion (RPE). Maximal effort is different for everyone because we all have different levels of conditioning.
A highly conditioned athlete can run at a 6 mph pace for 30 seconds with very little effort, translating to a 2 or 3 on the RPE scale. That athlete can probably run at 10 mph for 30 seconds at an 8 or 9 RPE.

A sedentary overweight individual might struggle to run 6 mph for 30 seconds. That would be that person's 10. Maybe that person can walk briskly for 30 seconds at 3.5 mph for 30 seconds. That might be a 2 or 3 for them. Making sense?

Here are two killer HIIT workouts for you to try:

5 minutes warmup begin at a fast walk and at 3 minutes begin an easy run RPE 2-4
1 minute sprint RPE 8-10
2 minute recovery RPE 2-4
Repeat sprint and recovery segments 5 times
5 minute cool down

or

3 minute brisk walk
30 seconds at a 9 RPE. Remember 9 RPE doe not mean 9 MPH. You may feel like you are going to die, but you will be OK.
30 seconds recover (jump your feet to either side of the belt) and catch your breath. It has never felt  so good to stand still.
Repeat the 30 on 30 off sequence 20 times.
3 minute cool down brisk walk.

The second workout is one that my boss at the gym showed me. He is completely insane.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Protein-packed silver dollar pancakes w/ blueberry syrup

Holy crap. 2010 is over and it is next year already. Everybody is making plans to conquer the world. How about some breakfast first, slugger?

The best way to start your new year is with a delicious breakfast that is also good for you. You may have  made wrong choices up to this point, but it doesn't matter now because you are going to kick ass this year.

These silver dollar pancakes are busting at the seams with protein, fiber and deliciousness. This recipe uses oats, which provide the slow carbs that will give you energy without the crash.

Top your pancakes with the blueberry syrup and make your tongue slap your brain in the face.

Here's what to do:

1 cup low-fat cottage cheese
3 egg whites
1 banana
1/4 cup water
1 cup oats
1/4 tsp cinnamon

Put all the ingredients in a blender. Process until you don't see chunks. Spray some olive oil onto a pan and pour batter in 2 inch circles. wait until you see bubbles start to form around the edges, then flip.

2 cups frozen blueberries
1 tsp agave nectar (optional)

In a saucepan, heat blueberries and agave nectar over medium-low heat until they are hot. Do this while you are cooking the pancakes. When all the pancakes are cooked and the blueberries are nice and hot, you can use a blender to make the blueberries into a syrup.

Makes 3 servings.

Calories 399
carbohydrate 60 g
fat 6.5 g
protein 22.5 g

Monday, December 20, 2010

Hot cocoa

Although drinking your calories is not ideal, sometimes you have to be human and do it anyway. If it came down to a decision of what to have for dessert, this hot chocolate is a wise choice for those of us trying to fit down any chimneys on Christmas eve.
So skip the chocolate chip cookies and just leave the jolly old guy this tasty beverage, to keep him dropping off goodies for years to come.

Here is a recipe for hot cocoa that I use. It is so good you will want to slap the Swiss Miss in her smug face!

2 cups nonfat milk
2 tablespoons cocoa
1 tablespoon agave nectar
1 packet stevia powder
1 teaspoon vanilla extract (more if you want that boozy feeling)

Whisk all the ingredients together and heat to 170 f on the stovetop, stirring regularly so scum doesn't form on the top.

Makes 2 servings.

140 calories.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Recipe for energy balls

I got this recipe from Oxygen magazine. Yes. I read my wife's Oxygen magazine. If you are a woman who works out (or a personal trainer), you need to ditch that Women's Health subscription right now. Another really awesome women's fitness magazine is Muscle & Fitness Hers. One of my clients introduced me to it. Awesome. Trade up to one of those mags.

But I am getting off topic.

 If you are making stuff for the holidays as I am, you might wonder what you could make for someone that won't make them fat. As a trainer, I am not interested in enabling the people around me to make bad dietary choices. To paraphrase something I read in one of the aforementioned ladies fitness magazines; Six-packs are made in the kitchen.

So man up and find your six-pack with these balls I found in a ladies magazine!
  •  2 1/2 cups pitted dates
  • 1/2 cup water
  • 1/3 cup natural peanut butter
  • 1 cup whey protein powder
  • 1/4 cup unsweetened, unprocessed cocoa
  • 1/4 cup ground flaxseed
  • 1 tsp gropund cinnamon
  • 1/2 cup ground nuts
  1. In a food processor, blend dates and water. 
  2. Add peanut butter and blend some more. get it really smooth. 
  3. Add protein powder in 1/2 cup increments so you don't kill your food prcessor.
  4. Add cocoa, flaxseed and cinnamon
  5. Process some more
 One that is all goopy, put it in the refigerator for a half hour. It is for the best.

Make sure you have clean hands, then you can gather some dough about the size of a gumball (not a jawbreaker). Roll it into a ball. If the dough is too sticky you can roll the ball in protien powder or cocoa.  I found you can also oil your hands, which works nice. You can use olive oil, but if you want to be super classy, you can use walnut oil to intensify the nut flavor.

Roll the ball ball in the nuts. Almost finished.

Put your balls on a cookie sheet.

Stick the cookie sheet in the freezer for 2-4 hours.
You will want to keep your balls in the freezer to protect the shape and texture.

eat 2 balls preworkout and 4 post workout
each bach makes 48 balls.

serving size 4 balls
230 cal
fat 7 g
carb 31 g
sugars 24 g
protein 15 g


BTW if you are one of my personal training clients, you will be getting a sack of balls from me. If you are family or anyone else, forget about it. Maybe you can bum some kombucha or something.